Attachment Issues and Relationship Patterns
(Jungian analysis and depth orientated psychotherapy in Brighton & Hove with online sessions via Zoom available as appropriate)
Attachment issues therapy in adulthood
Many people seek psychotherapy because relationships feel painful, confusing, or repetitive. You may find yourself drawn to the “wrong” partners, struggling with closeness, feeling chronically anxious about being left, or becoming distant when intimacy increases. These experiences are often described as attachment issues — patterns of relating that develop early and continue into adult life.
You do not need to be familiar with attachment theory to recognise the experience of it. Often, the first sign is simply the feeling that relationships bring more fear, distance, or uncertainty than safety and ease.
How attachment issues can show up
Attachment patterns are not personality flaws; they are often adaptations formed in response to early relationships. In adult life they may appear as:
- Anxious attachment: fear of abandonment, reassurance seeking, feeling “too much”, heightened sensitivity to distance
- Avoidant attachment: discomfort with dependence, feeling smothered, pulling away when things become close
- Disorganised attachment: longing for intimacy alongside fear, mistrust, rapid shifts between closeness and withdrawal
- Difficulties with trust, boundaries, emotional openness, or expressing needs
- A sense of loneliness even when in a relationship, or difficulty finding/keeping a partner
- Repeated relationship patterns: similar dynamics replaying in different relationships over time
Some people also notice that attachment difficulties sit alongside anxiety, low self worth, shame, or the sense of being emotionally “on guard”.
Attachment, childhood experience, and emotional safety
Attachment patterns usually develop in the context of early relational experience. Where care was inconsistent, intrusive, unavailable, or emotionally absent, a child adapts to maintain connection and safety. Later, those adaptations can persist in adult relationships.
This does not mean that therapy requires blaming parents or revisiting every detail of childhood. Often the most useful work begins with the present: how you experience closeness, distance, conflict, reassurance, and separation now — and what meanings these experiences carry for you. If you have also been affected by childhood trauma or emotional neglect, attachment issues can feel more intense and more difficult to change alone.
Psychotherapy for attachment issues
Therapy for attachment difficulties benefits from a steady, reflective pace. Rather than offering quick “relationship tips”, depth psychotherapy provides a reliable setting where relational patterns can be understood as they arise — not only in your outside relationships, but also in the therapeutic relationship itself.
Psychotherapy for attachment issues can help you to:
- recognise repeating patterns and the emotional logic behind them
- develop a stronger sense of internal safety and emotional steadiness
- understand fears of abandonment, engulfment, shame, or dependency
- clarify needs and boundaries without losing connection
- form more reliable, satisfying relationships over time
A Jungian and depthpsychology perspective
(without assuming prior knowledge)
My orientation is predominantly Jungian and analytic, but people come to me with many different levels of familiarity with Jungian psychology. Some arrive simply wanting psychotherapy for relationship difficulties; others come already seeking Jungian analysis. From a Jungian perspective, attachment patterns can be understood not only as behavioural tendencies but as expressions of the inner world — including unconscious expectations, complexes, and symbolic meanings that shape how we experience ourselves and others. The work may include attention to feeling, imagination, meaning, and (where relevant) dreams — always guided by what feels appropriate for you. You can read more about the difference between Jungian analysis and psychotherapy on the separate pages.
Beginning therapy
You may be very clear that attachment issues are affecting your relationships, or you may simply know that something repeats — a familiar cycle of longing, fear, withdrawal, conflict, or loneliness. If you are considering therapy for attachment issues, relationship patterns, fear of intimacy, or difficulty trusting, you are welcome to get in touch. Together, we can consider whether Jungian analysis or psychotherapy is the most appropriate place to begin.
Sessions are available in Brighton & Hove, with online sessions available where appropriate.
